THE HIGHS AND LOWS OF 3 DADS AS THEY TAKE  ON THE WEIGHT OF BEING A 9 MONTH PREGNANT MOM FOR ONE MONTH

JASON / 44 YEARS
DAD OF ONE
DAY
1

Deep End

I feel like the morning after a rugby match. I have aches in my back and sore shoulders. I certainly didn’t expect this after only one afternoon wearing the pregnancy suit. My whole body is adjusting to my new portly physique.
Real pregnancy is a gradual process rather than being thrown right into the deep end with a 35 pounder. Am feeling that this is a little unfair.
My wife wasn’t as sympathetic as I anticipated when I called her to wish her a Happy Valentines. I wonder whether this is because she is not here to witness my ordeal and this makes it difficult for her to comprehend what I am embarking on.
I reflect on the fact that I was working for much of her pregnancy and perhaps she felt very much alone at that time also? maybe I should have given her more mental support to her during the months that she was pregnant with our son.
I think this will be a whole month of reflection for better or for worse.

JASON / 44 YEARS
DAD OF ONE
DAY
2

A real sense of being alone.

Had everyone round to my house this morning for the official start of our pregnancy term.

Steve, his wife Kate and son Saul turned up first. Steve armed with a bottle of Cava and a nervous grin.

Jonny and family called to say they were running late as there was a half marathon blocking their way to my house. Jonny had considered doing the marathon in his pregnancy suit. Quite sure he is relieved that he had not committed to that now.

I had tried to connect with my wife and son in Singapore but couldn’t get through. Am guessing they were preparing for Chinese New Year.

Got a real sense of being alone on this now as each family rally around their pregnant dads.

I turned in early and attempted to find the sweet spot for a fine nights sleep. I started on my back but the dumbbell inside my pregnant belly slapped against my Cava filled bladder with every move I made.   Can this be what my wife went through? Actually given how busy my little boy is, I suspect this is exactly what she went through. She is a tougher girl than I am.

JASON / 44 YEARS
DAD OF ONE
DAY
3

Houdini

A very troubled sleep, I woke up constantly overheating and wrestling with my new assets. I was up early and had little trouble removing the pregnancy suit to take a shower. Finding my way back in it was considerably more complicated. Felt like I needed another shower when I eventually got into it.

I walked to work figuring that I should face the world with a brazen attitude. Received a number of reactions from disbelief to pure terror. I am sure most people think I am just massively overweight. I wonder whether heavily set people get this reaction all the time?

After the initial hysterics at work, the team had pretty much forgotten that I was packed inside a pregnant woman’s bodysuit by the end of the day.

Had a number of insightful conversations with Dan, our CTO, about what his pregnant wife is going through. He said she had already fainted a couple of times with the weight of the baby. I feel it Dan, I feel it.

JASON / 44 YEARS
DAD OF ONE
DAY
4

Spontaneity is a thing of the past.

I slept relatively well last night and got up and about feeling that I had to get on with the day. I have been feeling sluggish and slothful.
I decided to cycle to work to save some time, mounting the bike gave me quite a start. I then misread a speed bump and nearly lost everything. I decided on a much more cautious and leisurely pace.
So many simple things took so long to do today. The cable fell out of my computer and landed under my desk. I had to get on all fours to retrieve it. I then reversed out and hauled myself back into my chair only to drop my mobile. The whole process took what felt like the best part of the morning.
Have been putting off going to the bathroom today. It is such a palava and until I have found an efficient method of redressing myself, I will just have hold tight.
Feeling bloated is part of pregnancy, right?

JASON / 44 YEARS
DAD OF ONE
DAY
5

Helping Hand.

I wonder why pregnant women don’t use wheelchairs.

I have a chair in the office with wheels, this is a blessing. With the added weight of my pregnancy suit and one firm push, I can glide effortlessly across the office to my desired destination. Genius.

I had less fun on my way back from work. I decided to cycle despite the discomfort of having the hammer inside my pregnant belly slap against my groin.

I chose a more scenic and less crowded route today which took me through the park. All was going well until my front tyre burst and I came to a mal coordinated and ungracious halt.

I sat in a heap frantically trying to pump it up and got my self into quite a sweat. A family walked passed, I thought I they might lend me a hand. Instead the horrified parents whisked their children away, double quick, in the opposite direction.

I finished my journey home on foot. So much for the help I thought a pregnant person in distress would receive.

JASON / 44 YEARS
DAD OF ONE
DAY
6

Gong Xi Fat Cai! Happy Chinese New Year!

Woke up early thinking of my wife and son who were celebrating in Singapore. Would love to have been with them to share such a fabulous occasion. Just wanted to give them both a hug.
I had a disjointed Facetime call though and got a glimpse of my boy who seemed more interested in destroying the decorations than talking to his father.
Had my haircut today with Ner, my wonderful hairdresser, who is also pregnant but looking considerably more radiant than me, who feels bloated and haggard.
We exchanged stories of the trials of pregnancy. The swollen ankles, gas, cramps, hemorrhoids, heartburn and discharge. Delightful.
However I left feeling better informed and reassured, she had lifted my spirits and put a spring in my waddle.
The waitress in the local café where we frequent seems to be taking our pregnancy very seriously now and told me off for having a glass of wine. I informed her that I was born in 1970 and at that time my mother was certainly not worried about having a drink or two during her pregnancy so I was following her lead.
With that in mind, I had a pretty clear idea where I would stick the cork that was lying in front of me.

JASON / 44 YEARS
DAD OF ONE
DAY
7

Home alone

Hello is anyone there?

It is the first weekend that I will spend alone in the flat since being pregnant. I tried to have a lie in but was overheating and had lost feeling in my arms. The circulation had been cut off and I now felt like I not only have a foreign body attached to my front but to each side now.

The buzz of the office and banter that goes with it is now replaced with an uncomfortable silence. Started to really miss my wife and son and the wonderful chaos that he brings to my life.

Sat on the loo reading my book and discovered that I had run out of loo paper. Why now?

Showered and headed to the shop to get the necessities. Found a mega pack of giant sized loo rolls, 36 in total and dwarfs my belly in size. I did feel a bit self-conscience carrying them though as I waddled back to my house.

JASON / 44 YEARS
DAD OF ONE
DAY
8

Do it yourself.

Woke quite early thinking about the relatively simple household chores that I promised my wife I would do whilst she was away.

My son spends much of his time scaling the stairs in my house, which are a bit precarious. I have struggled with them in the past after a night on the town.
I bought a stair gate and have not got round to assembling it yet. The instructions were impossible to read, I spent much of my morning laying it all out on the floor and cursing the manufacturer.
I sat in a sulky heap with a thousand screws and plastic bits surrounding me.
I managed to figure it out in the end and with much grunting and sighing it is now in place.
The relatively simple chores have become mammoth tasks and I decide to call it a day. The thought of wallpapering my son’s bedroom is giving me a panic attack.

JASON / 44 YEARS
DAD OF ONE
DAY
9

From shock to sympathy.

Having initially received a mixed bag or reactions from horror, surprise to hysterics from the community around work. We now seem to be very much accepted now and regularly receive sympathetic smiles. I was even offered a chair when I was in the local printers.

Some of our providers from London had flown in for a meeting with us. I had not warned them that we would be looking a little larger than normal. Once again, after the initial bemusement they actually said that they had almost forgotten that we were pregnant by the time they had left. That may have been the Cognac in their coffee at lunch though.

I certainly seem to be feeling more at one with my pregnancy suit now, I think my body has got over its initial protest and has been forced into submission.

JASON / 44 YEARS
DAD OF ONE
DAY
10

Swinging.

I woke up feeling moody and sullen this morning. I have been fighting a lingering cold recently and this morning it decided to beat me up. Just to add to that, I vandalized my family jewels as I mounted my bicycle. Not a great start to the day.

Spoke to my wife and son on Facetime briefly, he was really cheerful to start off with and then burst into uncontrollable tears moments later. I feel much the same my little man.
I am told mood swings are very much part of pregnancy, they say that this occurs due to the fact that you are going through tremendous change. This seems incredibly accurate and relevant to me in my current state.
What I am not experiencing Is the surge of hormones levels and for that I am incredibly grateful. The greatest respect to you mums for coping with this.

JASON / 44 YEARS
DAD OF ONE
DAY
11

Funny peculiar.

I had a friend to stay last night, she is our fantastic and not unattractive yoga teacher Eva Bach. We cycled together to work, she seemed to be hanging back, I suspect that she was not entirely comfortable to be associated with me in public.

I don’t blame her. I was attracting quite a lot of attention. Judging from the reactions I could tell people thought I was funny, funny peculiar that is.

As we rode through the park some random man yelled ‘Oi pregnant dad!’ I couldn’t tell whether he was friend or foe so I peddled off with more determination and with my head down.

We seem to be making quite an impact around here.

Tomorrow we head to London, I have now added butterflies to my ample belly.

JASON / 44 YEARS
DAD OF ONE
DAY
12

The green and pleasant land. 

London certainly proved to be much more welcoming than I anticipated. On the whole our appearance was greeted with more curiosity and intrigue than the comments on the Daily Mail site might have had us believe. Generally very positive indeed. Maybe Londoners are exposed to more oddities than they are in Barcelona. Either way it lifted the substantial weight from my shoulders. Our print partners, Pureprint, were our first visit and the entire female workforce came to the meeting room to get the story. Really sweet and sincere. Lots of pretty supportive suggestions were dished out, I now know how to manage a surge in hormones and painful piles. Thanks girls.

JASON / 44 YEARS
DAD OF ONE
DAY
13

Knockout.

Just returned to Barcelona from London, the weather is warmer but the reaction to my unusual composition remains frosty.

It was a hectic trip to the UK, the pace of life is in the ol’ smoke is turbo charged. Fighting my way down Oxford Street was like being a contestant in that ridiculous old game show ‘It’s a knockout’.
Physically feeling quite punished today, the predicted symptoms of having an additional 33 pounds hanging from our bodies is taking it’s toll. My lower back is stiff as an old plank and my front feels like Mike Tyson has been using it as a punch bag.

We have arranged a session with the Chiropractor and considering a loungy afternoon in the Roman Baths. I am looking forward to bobbing around in the heated pools, suited or not.

JASON / 44 YEARS
DAD OF ONE
DAY
14

Pregnancy brain.

I booked a flight for my mother last night who is coming over to visit me. She feels I need her support during my ‘pregnant ordeal’ especially as my wife and son are away.

I am incredibly lucky to have such a wonderfully kind and loving mother.

I promptly sent the flight itinerary over to her and started to prepare for her arrival.

Out of the blue, a very dark blue since it was close to midnight, I received a call. It was my mum, She calmly suggested that I must be experiencing the genuine effects of pregnancy.

Confused, my response was curt.

‘Why?’

She explained that the flight I had booked was from the wrong destination and that it was impossible for take it, she reassured me saying that this was quite normal considering my current state and that I should not be alarmed.

 

This whole thing is getting out of hand now. I am not really pregnant and whilst it is typical for women to feel ungainly and foggy during pregnancy. I do not.

She is now on a new flight, booked correctly by me, and she will be joining me on Sunday.

JASON / 44 YEARS
DAD OF ONE
DAY
15

Front row.

We decided to watch the rugby in the local Irish Bar. Scotland v Italy and Wales v France. I lugged my self down town looking like a prop forward, to meet Steve and Jonny outside the bar. The front row was now complete.

We were immediately approached by a couple of older ladies. Obviously they were intrigued as to why we were dressed as we were but the focus of their conversation was that our posture was all wrong. They were Physiotherapists and were concerned that we were stooped like Quasimodo.

We were taken through a number of exercises amongst a growing crowd.

This entailed clenching our buttock cheeks and thrusting our pubic bone forward. Not the most elegant of pre match warm ups that I have experienced and not a good look at all.

Once in the bar, we enjoyed a certain amount of anonymity. I guess they just thought we were on a stag party. It made me think that this is a safe place to be and that it is here that I should be spending much more of my time.

JASON / 44 YEARS
DAD OF ONE
DAY
16

Whatsitsname?  

A question that I am frequently asked by many who have witnessed my expectant belly is: Well what are you going to call it?

‘It’ being the befitting word.

Many suggest that there may be more than one in my sizable oven.

Silly as it may sound we have josselled with a number of affectionate terms from Bump to Lump but they don’t really address the little guy inside.

It is an issue that many mothers to be face and it is a topic that is regularly addressed by the baby forums. They say that babies start off with a clean slate, so what you choose says more about your personality than theirs.

Whilst there are times that I have grown quite attached to this thing that sits in front of me, most of the time I find it an absolute pain.

My initial thought is to call it Morph, however I am open to suggestions.

If anyone has a better name do let me know.

JASON / 44 YEARS
DAD OF ONE
DAY
17

Who ate all the pies?

When I say that these pregnancy suits weigh 33 pounds some people find it hard to understand that that is a realistic weight gain during the last trimester of pregnancy. I generally receive a dismissive and ignorant ‘tut’ of disbelief.

Well, listen here:

Yes the average weight of a baby is 8 pounds but it needs to be understood that there are a whole load of other factors to take into consideration.

 

  • Baby: 8 pounds
  • Placenta: 2-3 pounds
  • Amniotic fluid: 2-3 pounds
  • Breast tissue: 2-3 pounds
  • Blood supply: 4 pounds
  • Stored fat for delivery and breastfeeding: 5-9 pounds
  • Larger uterus: 2-5 pounds

Total: 25-35 pounds

Obviously this is weight is gained gradually and the body adjusts accordingly.

We on the other hand have been lumped with the whole massive lot in one go.

Hope that clears that up then. I don’t want to hear another ‘tut’.

JASON / 44 YEARS
DAD OF ONE
DAY
18

Same same but different

I have received some criticism regarding the pregnancy suit that I am wearing. Mostly saying that carrying added weight does not touch on real pregnancy.

Wait a second I say, there is more to it than that. Here are the facts.

• Body weight gain of 30 or 33 pounds (2 sizes)
• Pregnant profile of enlarged breasts and protruding abdominal belly
• Change in physical and personal self-image continuous pressure on the abdomen and internal organs
• Postural changes of the back with an increase in lordosis or “pelvic tilt”
• Shift in one’s center of gravity; low backache
• Mild “fetal” kicking and stroking movements
• Shallow breathing capacity and shortness of breath increase in body temperature, pulse and blood pressure
• A flushing sensation and increased perspiration
• Awkwardness in all body movements
• Pressure on the bladder, with increased sense of urgency and frequency of urination
• Increased fatigue, slowed pace and restricted activity
• Changes in sexual self-image and abilities

I would never pretend that we are getting the real experience, not even close. BUT much more than most think. Now you know.

JASON / 44 YEARS
DAD OF ONE
DAY
19

One of those days.

Am getting tired of being seen as a clown.

Initially it was kind of fun, like going to a fancy dress party. What I didn’t take into account was that this party was to be a month long festival.

It is not so bad when I am with the other pregnant dads, you know, safety in numbers sort of thing. We can share the shame. But on my own, which is more often than not since my wife and son are away. I feel more vunerable.

Last night I went to get some groceries at my local super market, it wasn’t long before the security escorted me through the store. Pausing as I paused to fill my basket, not my belly with various fruit and veg. It’s not like I would have been able to have made a quick exit, quite the opposite. A tired trudge at best.

My own fault I guess, I chose to fully commit myself to this charade and am determined to finish it.

JASON / 44 YEARS
DAD OF ONE
DAY
20

Ruby Murray

Despite the common claim of ‘eating for two’, women need very few extra calories during pregnancy. Mothers-to-be don’t need to change their diet at all for the first six months, and even in the last three they need just 200 extra calories a day, the equivalent of a small sandwich.

I, on the other hand, seem to be eating for many more than two despite not really being pregnant.
Only last night I ordered a curry and managed to polish off a Lamb Rogan Josh, Chicken Tikka Masala, Saag Aloo, Piloa rice and 2 Garlic Naan.
And it would be stupid to think that I am having cravings since wearing this pregnancy suit. It is simply not the case I have always craved a proper curry and usually on a Friday night.

Just for the record, I have not been wanting to eat coal or clay or anything ridiculous like that.

JASON / 44 YEARS
DAD OF ONE
DAY
21

Party time.

It is my son’s 1st birthday on the 16th March so I have decided to put on a little party for him and in preparation will be heading to the party shop to buy balloons and daft decorations. This means walking down the Ramblas in Barcelona. As many of you will know, this is full of tourists not necessarily rambling but charging so I am preparing myself for battle.

The one reassuring thing is that there will be street artists lining the street and I might be passed off as one of these guys. Might even earn a bit of cash!
It is a beautiful Spring morning and am having difficulty knowing what to wear with my pregnancy suit. Overheating and perspiration is a given so I think I will go minimalistic and sport a pair of shorts. I hope they are ready for this.

JASON / 44 YEARS
DAD OF ONE
DAY
22

Respect

Just been on BBC World service radio where we were talking about our experience in pregnancy suits and the motives behind it.

The presenter and two other guests were in London whilst we were in a studio in Barcelona. It is International Women’s Day so that was really the focus of the programme.

One of the female guests thought the sentiment was nice but explained that it hardly represented real pregnancy she said that she had oused liquid from every orifice and suffered terrible morning sickness. I suddenly started to feel morning sickness at the very thought of it.

We have never pretended that we were going to experience the real thing, far from it. Our intention has always been to play our part in understanding ‘ a smidgen’ (as Steve puts it) of pregnancy and some of its trials. This is and always has been about honouring our mothers and wife’s who have had to go through this. We need not have done so but we have and feel slightly better informed and have opened up a debate.

To mothers, all over the world, we give you our respect.

JASON / 44 YEARS
DAD OF ONE
DAY
23

Sitges.  

Had Sunday lunch with my great friends, the Millers. in Sitges, a smallish coastal down just south of Barcelona. I was slightly anxious since this was the first time I had been out of Barcelona on my own wearing my pregnancy suit.

Sitges, for those that don’t know, has a substantial gay community and the thought of staggering down the promenade with a swollen belly and swinging breasts made me sweat more profusely than normal.

I need not have worried. No-one battered an eyelid. I was not receiving the horrified glares nor gasps of despair that I have become accustomed to.

Perhaps the community in Sitges judge less and let people be people.

It was reassuring and I felt accepted. I strolled on with confidence to the restaurant.

Once I was in the restaurant the children of my friends asked why I was wearing the suit and said that I looked silly but almost immediately behaved as if I was no different to any one else. Again, there was no judgement what so ever.

What a great day.

JASON / 44 YEARS
DAD OF ONE
DAY
24

Hat’s off.

We have now been wearing this Pregnancy suit day and night for the best part of a month. It has become a burden, rather like a stubborn boil. I don’t grow attached to boils and I feel the same about this lump. I am sure that I will experience similar relief when it is finally removed.

We went into this whole project somewhat naively, the whole idea was to show some empathy to our wife’s and mothers. The pregnancy suits have certainly been informative in terms of giving us an idea of the discomforts they may have experienced.

The respect and gratitude I now have to my wife, Mondrey, for being so strong during her pregnancy with my son is now unmeasurable. I feel like I had my head in the clouds during the whole process. Excited and giddy about what would be, rather than what was actually going on.

JASON / 44 YEARS
DAD OF ONE
DAY
25

Back, whack and crack.

I have been looking forward to this day for some time now. A day being gently massaged and my body being manipulated back into its original shape. I have almost forgotten how I used to appear.

I wake up most mornings feeling like an old man with a clumsy, hobbling gait.

I am pretty sure I look much the same.

I make my way down to the Chiropractic clinic and am greeted by a tall, well presented Belgium man who I am informed used to be a climber. He himself had had a lot of realignment of the vertebrae, apparently he had fallen from a great height and broke apart like Lego. You wouldn’t have known.

I am instructed to lie on the bed and before I knew it I am being pulled and stretched into inconceivable positions.

The gentle massage turned into a grapple with every bone cracking like popcorn.

I left feeling high and disorientated but no doubt better off for it.

 

JASON / 44 YEARS
DAD OF ONE
DAY
26

Ted

It is my sons 1st birthday on Monday, I think I am more excited than anyone. I haven’t seen him for a whole month and I miss him terribly.

He and my wife have missed out on this whole fiasco much to their relief. Thinking about it, I am not sure I want my son to remember me as a gender bender anyway.

My great friend Bruce told me that he had left a birthday present for him in the London office and that I should take it back to Barcelona.

I have just picked it up and it is a giant teddy bear, the size of a small truck.

I have difficulty lugging myself across London, now I have two of us to transport.

I am convinced Bruce had pre planned this, knowing fine well that it was going to be a nightmare. Whilst Bruce is one of the kindest men in the world and a fine friend, he is one of the most annoying. I will get my revenge Bruce.

JASON / 44 YEARS
DAD OF ONE
DAY
27

What did I do to deserve this?  

Well we reached the target ‘likes’ on Facebook and it looks like we are going to be experiencing simulated labour contractions. I was not the finale before Mother’s Day that I expected nor is it one that I am looking forward to.

I have just checked out a film on YouTube and we must be nuts to agree to this. Jonny seems to be looking forward to this and I blame him for instigating it.

At 9am we will be hooked up to a machine that uses electro stimulations to simulate contractions and experience the pains of childbirth.

As if we haven’t suffered enough over the last month. I think there might be three grown men screaming and crying in our pillows.

I am wondering whether we will be given a heavy dose of Morphine to deal with the pain.

This is going to be one mother of a day…

JASON / 44 YEARS
DAD OF ONE
DAY
28

Countdown

I am over excited to see my wife and son and have had difficulty sleeping. I had set my alarm but constantly woke to check the time.

I am sure that the simulated labour contractions we were given yesterday had plenty to do with my restless night. I felt like I had been turned inside out.
I am tired and emotional and am sapped of all energy. There will be tears when I see my family again.
My wife has no idea quite how mad this month has been. Of course I have spoken with her during the ordeal but when she sees me in person with this ridiculous suit on I guess my she may consider my whinging justified.
One more day to go though and I will be rid of the suit, I wonder whether I will be bouncing around like a new born lamb when the massive weight has been removed.

JASON / 44 YEARS
DAD OF ONE
DAY
29

Free at last

I woke up with my wife beside me and my son making a racket downstairs, at last life has returned to normal again.

I no longer have to wear this blasted pregnancy suit. I never want to see it again quite frankly. It has been my ball and chain whilst my family were away, kept me out of trouble but it has served its purpose in other ways: I have a more thorough understanding and admiration for Mothers and mums to be. particularly my wife Mondrey who I could not love more for giving me my little boy.
Huge respect and love to my own mother who is not only my best friend but a huge inspiration to me.

Happy Mothers Day.

jason

…WHY?

What started as a meeting about improving The Book of Moms, a personalised book that celebrates anyones and everyones mom, became something very different. Somewhere in the meeting the name Anna Jarvis came up as the women that trademarked the name ‘Mother’s day’,  who intended Mother’s day as a yearly event to honour Mom.

How could the 3 men (all in their mid 40’s) honour their moms and the memory of Anna Jarvis at the same time, in a way that will be tough, and meaningful?  What if we became pregnant?  Or as near as possible.  A thought became an idea which turned into an dare, and now there’s no going back.

DO SOMETHING SPECIAL FOR YOUR MOM

The Book of Mom, a fun and fabulously original personalised book all about your mom. This is a special edition, created just for mum:  Touching and entertaining. It’s fast to make and free to preview.

VISIT THE SHOP

GET INVOLVED

We want you! Join in and help us to prod and cajole the guys in the right direction over the course of the month. Get involved with your thoughts, ideas and comments. It’s gonna be a whole lot of fun. :)

  • C. W.

    I just watched the burst tire post – I was 8 months pregnant with a flat tire on my car. A guy drove by slowly, gawking at me, and I yelled at him to help but he just took off yelling something about a meeting. Huge belly lifting a tire from the trunk and the guy wouldn’t stop. I wanted to drop the rim on his foot.

    • thebookofeveryone

      That’s terrible! Jason can empathise with you completely.. although he was just a man in a suit.. you should have got help being a 8 month pregnant women!!

  • Pingback: ()

  • tabby

    How has this changed what you will be putting into the books?

    • thebookofeveryone

      Hi Tabby, Throughout the month we’ve been creating and adding new content, all about how amazing mums are. It’s helped the guys to really appreciate all what their mums had done for them and what other mother’s do for their families. Adding more depth and love into each new page :)

  • tabby

    Yeah, you can totally blame Jonny! Some may not get this, but being told to breath in a pattern during an intense contraction is only funny to the person saying it! Usually this is the moment when the woman starts plotter her mates murder, and sometimes decides to attempt it just then!